The Psychological Effects of Divorce on Children Essay Example

The Psychological Effects of Divorce on Children Essay The Psychological Effects of Divorce on Children Dee Whitworth Angelina College Abstract Divorce can have many psychological effects on a child. When a marriage ends in divorce, a child of the marriage may view the divorce the same as if a parent has died. During the period following a parental separation a child may have feelings of denial, anxiety, abandonment, anger, guilt, depression and conflicts of loyalty. Because of the pain and emotional damage the child is sure to suffer, many parents stay in a dysfunctional marriage believing it is the best thing for their child. There are some cases where staying together for the sake of the child can actually be detrimental to the child. A parent can diminish the negative effects of a divorce by supporting and reassuring their children, before, during and after the separation. A parent can rebuild the child’s sense of security by reestablishing stability. If parents do not take the time to address the emotional needs of the child during the process of a divorce, parents can damage their relationship with their child and the emotional development of the child. Keywords: Divorce, Psychological effects, Children Divorce is a stressful time for every member of a family. The psychological effects of a child during this stressful time depend in part on the age of the child and the parents’ ability to control their emotions and to work together to sooth and reassure the child. Hetherington and Stanley-Hagan (1999) believe children in this age group are too young to understand what is happening. Even though these children may not understand what is happening between their parents, they may sense the distress their parents are feeling, and react negatively. We will write a custom essay sample on The Psychological Effects of Divorce on Children specifically for you for only $16.38 $13.9/page Order now We will write a custom essay sample on The Psychological Effects of Divorce on Children specifically for you FOR ONLY $16.38 $13.9/page Hire Writer We will write a custom essay sample on The Psychological Effects of Divorce on Children specifically for you FOR ONLY $16.38 $13.9/page Hire Writer According to Cohen (2002), â€Å"Infants and children younger than 3 years may reflect their caregivers’ distress, grief, and preoccupation; they often show irritability, increased crying, fearfulness, separation anxiety, sleep and gastrointestinal problems, aggression, and developmental regression† (p. 1019). The parents of a child in this age group need to work together to foster feelings of security in their child. According to Henning and Oldham (1977), Parents of pre-school hildren that establish consistent routines and reassure their children that they will not be abandoned are able to reestablish a child’s sense of security. Children that are four and five years of age sometimes feel that they are to blame for their parent’s divorce. They feel that if they had not been bad their parents would not be getting divorced. Additionally, children in this age group tend to believe that they can make their parents reconcile by being a good child. According to Henning and Oldham (1977), â€Å"Young children and pre-school children have an incomplete and confused understanding of what has caused such a radical change in the family routine† (p. 55). Cohen (2002) states that â€Å"At 4 to 5 years of age, children often blame themselves for the breakup and parental unhappiness, become more clingy, show externalizing behavior (acting out), misperceive the events of the divorce situation, fear that they will be abandoned, and have more nightmares and fantasies† (p. 1019). It has been implied that boys in this age group have a harder time adjusting to the divorce than young girls. According to Max (1970), the effects of an absent father are felt the most by boys aged four to six. Hetherington and Stanley-Hagen (1999) found that â€Å"Fathers involvement has been found to be greater with sons following divorce and to be more important for the development of boys than of girls† (p. 132). You could argue that the reason for this is because sons get their gender identify from their father, so the loss of a father affects a boy more than it does a girl. Parents can alleviate some of the anxiety of the child by allowing the father access to the child. If it is not possible for the father to maintain a close relationship with the child, due to violence or sexual abuse, the mother should take steps to find a suitable male role model to help her children, like a coach or scout leader (Sugar, 1970, p. 592). Gardner (1977) tells us that children often use a male teacher as a surrogate father figure. Adolescents and teenagers are more likely to openly show their anger toward their parents and become depressed during a divorce. They are more likely to act out by stealing, lying and becoming sexually promiscuous. These behaviors can lead the child to become pregnant or associate with other children who are also displaying delinquent behavior (Hetherington and Stanley-Hagan, 1999, p. 131). Cohen (2002) has stated that â€Å"School-aged children may be moody or preoccupied; show more aggression, temper, and acting out behavior; seem uncomfortable with gender identity; and feel rejected and deceived by the absent parent. School performance may decrease, and they may agonize about their divided loyalties and feel that they should be punished† (p. 1019). Adolescents and teenagers are often torn between their parents and show an alliance to one parent over the other parent. This alliance makes it difficult for the child to talk to one parent without feeling as if they are betraying their loyalty to the other parent. The alliance may also be utilized by the child to manipulate their parent (Henning @ Oldham, 1977, p. 56). Some children in this age group deal with their negative feelings by pulling away from their parents and becoming more independent. Hetherington and Stanley-Hagan (1999) found that â€Å"Some girls actually seem to be enhanced by dealing with the responsibilities, independence, and challenges associated with divorce in a supportive environment† (p. 132). Although some girls do seem to thrive after a divorce, they often grow into young women who set exceptionally high expectations for themselves, but still feel inadequate no matter how much they may accomplish. Although divorce has been found to enhancement some girls, it is rarely found that divorce has enhanced boys (Hetherington @ Stanley-Hagan, 1999, p. 132). Some parents maintain their unhappy marriage because they fear a divorce would negatively affect their child. In some cases, maintaining a turbulent marriage may be more detrimental to a child than an actual divorce (Rosen, 1977, p. 26). Additionally, â€Å"children adjust better in a harmonious single parent household that in an acrimonious two-parent household† (Hetherington @ Stanley-Hagan, 1999, p. 37). This confirms that a child can be negatively affected when parents try to stay together for the sake of the child. Rhona Rosen, M. A. , interviewed 92 children of divorce and found that â€Å"73 children stated in the strongest terms that they would not have chosen to have their parents stay together in conflict† (Rosen, 1977, p. 24). Parents who maintain a combative relationship for the sake of the child are actua lly hurting the child’s psychological development more than if they divorced. Hetherington and Stanley-Hagan (1999) believe â€Å"Children whose parents will later divorce is already showing problems in adjustment many years before the divorce† (p. 133). Children who are well adjusted before divorce are better able to adapt and navigate through the stressful time of divorce. Children who were poorly adjusted before a divorce continue having problems after a divorce and are at greater risk for adjustment problems in later life (Hetherington, 1999, p. 133). A lack of parental communication and guidance causes great distress to a child during a pending divorce. The paramount problem of children during the divorce process is that the adults involved in marital strife are not looking for ways in which to help their children adjust to the transition, but are searching for ways to implement their own personal life readjustment† (Henning @ Oldham, 1977, p. 56). Parents neglect to talk to their child the divorce because they fear giving too much informatio n would be detrimental to the child. This lack of information causes the child to blame themselves for the divorce or to come up with their own explanations for their parent’s divorce, which could be worse than the actual reasons for the divorce. According to Gardner (1977), â€Å"To deprive the children of information regarding the major issues that brought about the divorce can only produce distrust of the parents at a time when they are most in need of a trusting relationship† (p. 4). Couples that have friendly, cooperative relationships do not usually get divorced. When a relationship deteriorates and a couple decides to divorce, and there is a child involved, they need to put aside their hostilities and focus on the needs of the child. A child who is a product of divorce who has loving, supportive, communicative parents is more likely to be happy and social well adjusted. Alternatively, a child who is a product of divorce and has parents who remain combative and hostile is more likely to suffer depression and have dysfunctional relationships throughout their life. References Cohen, G. (2002). Helping Children and Families Deal With Divorce and Separation. American Academy of Pediatrics, 110(6), 1019-1023. Gardner, R. (1977). CHILDREN OF DIVORCE-SOME LEGAL AND PSYCHOLOGICAL CONSIDERATIONS. Journal of Clinical Child Psychology, 6(2), 3-6. Henning, J. , Oldham, J. (1977). CHILDREN OF DIVORCE: LEGAL AND PSYCHOLOGICAL CRISES. Journal of Clinical Child Psychology, 6(2), 55-58. Hetherington, E. , Stanley-Hagan, M. (1999). The Adjustment of Children with Divorced Parents: A Risk and Resiliency Perspective. Journal of Child Psychology Psychiatry Allied Disciplines, 40(1), 129-140. Rosen, R. (1977). CHILDREN OF DIVORCE: WHAT THEY FEEL ABOUT ACCESS AND OTHER ASPECTS OF THE DIVORCE EXPERIENCE. Journal of Clinical Child Psychology, 6(2), 24-26. Sugar, M. (1970). CHILDREN OF DIVORCE. Pediatrics, 46(4), 588-595.

SAT Practice Tests How to Reflect and Get the Most Out of Them

SAT Practice Tests How to Reflect and Get the Most Out of Them SAT / ACT Prep Online Guides and Tips Taking an SAT practice test is one thing, and using the results to actually improve your scores in the future is another. If you’re spending five hours on a practice test, you should make sure that you’re getting the most out of it and not sweeping your mistakes under the rug. In this article, I’ll give you some different strategies for making your practice test sessions count. Mistakes on Practice Tests: What They Look Like and Why They're Important After taking a practice test, it’s extremely important to look back at the questions you answered incorrectly and make assessments about which areas need the most improvement. You’re not going to be able to raise your SAT scores until you get to the bottom of what’s holding you back. Through evaluating your mistakes and fixing them methodically, you can make dramatic changes to your performance on the test. Most mistakes on the SATwill fall into one of four categories: Ran Out of Time Basically, this applies to questions that you missed because you didn’t get to them or you just guessed randomly at the end.If you end up with a lot of these types of mistakes, you'll need to revise some of your strategies for test taking.See our articles on how to stop running out of time on SAT Reading and SAT Math for advice. Content Weakness This type of mistake means that you didn’t understand the underlying concept that was being tested.This will come up most frequently on the math section.These mistakes can be broken down into more specific categories like â€Å"confusion about factoring† so that you know exactly which materials you need to study to improve your weak areas. Misunderstanding the Question This is a mistake where the phrasing of a question confused you and prompted you to answer incorrectly.These are tricky mistakes to fix, but it’s important to pay attention to them.Usually misunderstandings can be at least partially remedied by practice with the format of the test and greater familiarity with the types of questions that the SAT likes to ask. Careless Mistakes These are the mistakes you made that seem absurd in hindsight.You might have missed a â€Å"NOT† or an â€Å"EXCEPT† in a question, or you might have solved for the wrong value in a math problem.Usually these mistakes are a result of not reading carefully enough and letting your anxiety get the best of you. All of these mistakes can be remedied if you acknowledge them and adjust your study strategies appropriately. In the next section, I'll give you some tips on how to reflect on the results of practice tests by categorizing your mistakes and fixing them methodically. It's corny, but it's true. How to Understand and Reflect on Practice Test Mistakes Depending on how much time you have, you might use different strategies to reflect on your mistakes on practice tests. If You Have 20-40 Hours to Prep: You’re going to need to work fast to fix your mistakes, so you might not have time to get into the deeper issues you have with content weaknesses.After you take an initial practice test, you should see if you noticed any obvious areas of weakness. If you noticed that running out of time was a big issue, you might need to pace yourself better next time you take the test.Most of the time, this just means skipping difficult questions when you start to spend too much time on them (more than 30 seconds). Answer all the more straightforward questions first, and then go back and work on the hard ones so you don't miss out on any easy points at the end of the section. If you made a lot of careless mistakes, you should remind yourself to read the questions more carefully next time and check your answers at the end of each section.Careless mistakes sometimes mean you're rushing too much, so you may need to remind yourself to slow down a little and think through each question thoroughly before answering. If you notice some relatively superficial content weaknesses, you may be able to study up on those and fix them, but if you’re confused about a big topic area it’s best to just focus on more easily fixable problems in the short time you have before the test. After you spend four hours or so analyzing your mistakes, adjusting your strategies to account for them, and doing relevant practice questions, you cantake another test and see how you do.Repeat the same process of fixing your mistakes with the second practice test, and then take a third and final practice test when you’re done.If you have a little more time and you've noticed that you're improving significantly (by 50 to 100 points) with each new practice test, you can repeat the process again before your real test date. If You Have 40-100 Hours to Prep: If you have this much time, you can do a complete analysis of your mistakes on practice tests. First, take an initial practice test to get a baseline reading on your scores.After you finish scoring the test, you should go back through all of the questions that you answered incorrectly and categorize them based on the types of mistakes I mentioned in the previous section. Once you’ve categorized all of your mistakes, you can rank your areas of weakness from most frequently observed to least. This will allow you to get a better sense of where most of your mistakes are coming from and which areas need the most work. Then, you can start fixing things in order of which mistakes will respond the fastest to corrective prep measures.Usually, this means starting with content weakness since these mistakes can be fixed simply by studying up on the material you don’t know. They have the least to do with the format of the test itself, so they will respond more quickly to your studying efforts.Then, you can move on to formulating better strategies for coping with issues like time pressure and careless mistakes. After you’ve done a thorough assessment of your mistakes and corrected the most glaring problems you noticed, you should take another practice test to see whether you've improved.If you notice significant improvements, you can do another assessment to reevaluate your mistakes and shoot for even higher goals.If not, you should reconsider the manner in which you addressed your mistakes initially and see if you need to push your studying further and do more practice questions in order to break through to a higher score. Repeat the process of taking practice tests and assessing your mistakes until you reach a score level that makes you happy. You can consult this guide for advice on calculating a good target score for your needs.You might also decide to adjust your study time between practice tests to accommodate your personal level of focus and learning style. Taking a practice test is like sending out a crash test dummy for your SAT scores. When you reach your target score, you're safe to drive on the real SAT. Smart Practice Testing Strategies (Based on Your Score Level) In order to make the most out of each of your practice tests, you'll have to use test-taking strategies that work to your advantage. Many improvements are dependent on adjusting your strategy, especially when it comes to issues with running out of time and careless mistakes. The most effective strategies may differ depending on how well you’re currently scoring on the SAT. Crucial Tips for Taking a Practice Test, Regardless of Your Score Level: Stick to the real time constraints Take the test in a quiet, distraction-free environment Only use the materials you will have access to on the real test These tips are important because if you take practice tests with a longer time allotment or with more resources that you'll have on the real test, you won't get a realistic prediction ofyour performance. This will only hurt you in the long run when you end up getting scores that are lower than you expected on the actual SAT. Below are some more specific strategies for high and low scorers. I've divided the strategies this way because high and low scorers on the SAT often have very different needs. Low scorers may be able to afford to skip difficult questions completely, whereas high scorers need to try and answer most if not all of the questions in each section. People at different score levels also tend to make different types of mistakes, which I'll get into in a minute. You would be considered a high scorer if you're consistently scoring an 1800 or higher on practice tests. You would be considered a low scorer if you're consistently scoring a 1500 or lower. For High Scorers: You should approach the test with an eye towards avoiding careless mistakes and preventing yourself from rushing on complex questions.Careless mistakes are usually more common for high scorers.Students who are already doing well on the SAT tend to rush through sections and not take â€Å"easy† questions as seriously, so they end up missing things. Glance at the time now and then to make sure you’re pacing yourself appropriately. You should also be sure to double check your work at the end of each section; you can catch a lot of silly errors if you make a habit of doing this. For Low Scorers: The best strategy for taking practice tests if you’re scoring low on the SAT is to takea quick pass through each section initially and answer all of the easy questions first.This ensures that you won’t run out of time before you get to all the questions that you have the potential to answer correctly.After you finish answering all of the easy questions, you can go back through and spend more time on medium difficulty questions while feeling less pressured to get through the rest of the section. Using these strategies will help you to maximize your score and reduce mistakes progressively on each practice test. You'll be teaching yourself valuable skills for avoiding unnecessary pitfalls on the real test and increasing your familiarity with question types and test content along the way. It might be slow going at first, but with lots of practice you can make big positive changes in your scores. What's Next? Looking for some alternate SAT prep resources? Check out our article on the best websites to use for SAT prep. If you're not sure how much you need to prepare for the SAT, this guide will tell you how long you should be studying for the test based on your goals. You should also take a look at our SAT study plans for sophomore and junior year and for the summer before senior year. Disappointed with your scores? Want to improve your SAT score by 160 points?We've written a guide about the top 5 strategies you must be using to have a shot at improving your score. Download it for free now: